Retirement Party Thoughts

Had my retirement party last night. We waited until September for a couple of reasons. First, as a teacher, not working would not really hit until school was back in session. Secondly, I figured more people would be able to attend once school was back in session. I was right on the first count, wrong on the second.
Thanks to facebook, I invited close to 400 people directly, and 700 indirectly. We got confirmations from about 70 people and a few more "maybes" so we decided to order food for 100 people. Wendy, one of my former students is a wedding planner, organized almost all of the event, and has a deathly fear of running out of food. My fear was ordering food for a large number and having the event attended by a small number. Turns out my fears came true. While not getting an actual head count, I think there were about 40 people total, and fewer than 10 of those were former students. Jan's first words when we got in the car were, "are you disappointed?" Honestly, yes. Also honestly, I had a great time with every single person who took the time to come. That's what I'm taking away. My spiritual Enemy was whispering the whole night, "Only 7? I guess the last 36 years of your life didn't amount to much." If I take the approach that the party was all about me and validating my career, he would be right. Had lots of time to think about it before and during the festivities (caterer was an hour late to boot), and decided that the Enemy, by definition, is a liar.
So I'm not going to focus on who didn't come. Many sent their regrets, and I cannot argue with their reasons--tho not wanting to drive from North Carolina or Mississippi seem to be pretty weak excuses to me!! I'm going to focus on who DID come, and what they mean to me.

First of all, every member of my immediate family was there, except Jolie, who had a sleepover, and I'll see her tomorrow and I have no doubt about how she feels about her grampa. Jeff and Jen came even though Jeff's 20th high school reunion was also yesterday. Tim and Anne drove in from Riverside to be there, even though they have to drive in from Riverside every day of the week for work.
My sister and brother in law drove down from Shaver Lake Friday, so we had a great weekend with them. My nephew Brian drove down from Fresno with his oldest and youngest, Hannah and Jacob, even though he had to drive back last night so as not to miss Caleb and Emma's soccer games. That made me feel really special, especially when Hannah decided to stay and spent the night with us, along with Jeslyn. Nephew Jeff came with Brian, making the trip from Seattle. The only one missing from that group was nephew Todd, and we spent an hour on the phone as he expressed his regrets at not being able to come from Vancouver, WA.
The Thorns, friends from our former church, took the time to come. Scott and Leslie met and married while they were members of our singles class, have 4 beautiful daughters, and we spent precious time with them, and look forward to attending the girls water polo matches at Pacifica and maybe Long Beach State if Kirsten makes the team as a walk-on. Leslie took care of Jolie when she was a baby and her sister Robyn took care of Jeslyn, so our girls have a strong bond that was still evident last night.
Eric, worship pastor at our former church came, along with Alyssa and Jacob. That was really meaningful, and further cemented an already strong friendship. It was good to watch the Thorns and Hendricksons interract with the Russells and Tim and Anne.
Cheryl Denio was there. Cheryl Denio was in charge of the attendance office for the 24 years I was Tustin High School, has been retired awhile, and planted a seed when she pointed out she went sky diving for the first time at age 70. I think she would win my award for "most surprising attendee."
Tom Tallman was another colleague that was there. Tom taught with me at THS until 1982, and is now subbing quite a bit in the district. He was my automatic sub any time I needed one last year and it has been great to renew our friendship.
There were 3 students from the Tustin class of 1980. Wendy, who planned the party and did a great job. She worked tirelessly to get things ready and running, stayed long after to tie up the loose ends, and did all without compensation as a "labor of love for my teacher." Cynthia, who I actually have known less than a year. She went to dinner with Wendy and I a few months ago, is one of my biggest blog supporters, and took the great pictures that she's posted on fb from last night. Feel like I've known her forever. Andrew, who played basketball for me in 1978, made a special effort to come, and we talked away quite a bit of the evening. Again, I haven't seen him since he graduated from THS, yet it was important to him to come to this event.
Lisa, Renee and Mark came from the class of '82. I've kept up with Mark recently through his FB posts, used to bowl with Lisa a couple of years ago, and Renee was the statistician for a lot of the teams I coached. Great to see them.
The only Foothill alum to come was Chloe. I had her for 2 years in math, she was a great softball player at Foothill and is now playing for Cal State Fullerton. She brought a card which told me, 'I wouldn't have made it through high school without you.'
Jerry showed up, in his sheriff's uniform, having just gotten off duty--thus a couple of pretty funny pics taken by Cynthia. Jerry was Tustin '78, and his daughter was in my Algebra 2 class this past year at Foothill, and will be a big player in the Foothill basketball program this year. Jerry is one of my heroes, having taken a couple of bullets in the line of duty for OCSD, and it was really special that he came.
Scott A, one of the Foothill campus supervisors and coaches, came after attending a funeral. Scott and I go way back, he having been in my sunday school class in high school and college and also on recent bowling teams. He and his family are very special to me.
Heather and Darren came even tho they have a new home and Heather is expecting their first child in a month or so. Heather was Tustin '89, and I've blogged about her before. Her presence made the evening complete. Good also to spend some time with Darren--they are still relative newlyweds, and the wedding was not a time for us to get acquainted. He's a social science major, which in the current climate means "no jobs available" but he's recently gotten a full-time non-classroom position at Tustin High, and is coaching football. It was great to listen to them testify to God's provision during this time of economic uncertainty in education.
Hope I haven't left anyone out. If I did, I blame a senior moment.
So, if you are one of the people who said they were coming, the only thing you missed was getting your name in this blog.
My friend Kristi has a phrase called Spiritual Spice, which I think means finding a spiritual interpretation for events that seem non-spiritual. I think it applies here. I could choose to listen to the voice that wants to minimize my career based on the number of people who showed up for my party. To do that would be the same as those who choose to judge Jesus based on the actions of some of his followers. Instead, I choose to be thankful for those who enriched my life by their appearance last night. Just as I choose to love Jesus based on the blessings he has provided, and the friends I have who demonstrate his love by their daily service. Yes, it hurt that some didn't value their commitment enough to attend (it hurt emotionally AND financially!). Again, such is human nature--we hurt each other. In this case I'm sure the hurt was unintentional, but nonetheless real. We are not perfect. If I choose to base my value on the quantity rather than the quality of last night's turnout, I would feel badly. I choose to base my value on the fact that my saviour loves me enough to die for me, as would many of the people in the room last night. And vice versa. And that's enough.